Sometimes life whizzes by and I’m always amazed at how quickly it changes; and how much it changes me. For instance, my youngest whose a kindergartner now goes all day instead of a half day to get the extra help she needs. It’s freed up my time and allowed me to focus on all things I pushed off for exactly when this day would happen. Unfortunately it’s a lot more than I thought.
But in some ways it changes more slowly almost to the point that I miss it. Yesterday, my father had surgery and today, I took him for a follow up visit at the doctor. No worries as it seems everything is okay and will be okay. However, I felt that this was a small change in our relationship and that I would be doing more care taking of not only my father, but my mother as well. It’s not something I look forward to because I don’t want to see my parents aging, closer to the end than the beginning.
This small change made me reflect on another point of change in my relationship with my parents. When I was in my earlier twenties, I had this realization that my parents and my views weren’t always going to be the same. That I was becoming my own person with my own thoughts about the world, politics, religion, and etc. Yes, my parents helped influence some of this, but I was starting to reject some of their thoughts and ideas. For some reason this gradual period of transition was hard for me and helped me become the adult I am today.
I’m wondering if this new change from being the child to the caretaker will fall under the category of big or small. I guess only time will tell. What about you? Do you miss the small changes? Do you see the change in yourself?